You don’t want to miss a scene so you press pause…
You have to take a bathroom break so you press pause…
You get interrupted so you press pause…
The definition of pause is an interrupted action or speech briefly; a temporary stop in action or speech. Our actions are being interrupted and we have been brought to a temporary stop. It seems that our show has been interrupted by important things and the pause button is being pressed. Let me explain…
Over the course of the last couple months, we have been praying and waiting about the timing of our return to the Philippines. We have been speaking to our boys about going back one more time before they begin their own dreams and place steps towards their futures. We have been speaking to each other about the farms, the people and the future there in the Philippines and how it could all work together with our family and our futures.
As we began to move into the direction of leaving in the fall, back to the Philippines, we found that our lack of peace and an unsettling in our boy’s hearts were present. We are not the kind of parents to direct our actions based on the feelings of our teenagers and by all accounts, their words were agreeable and their willingness to sacrifice true. But we knew…and we could sense that there might need to be a change of plans.
You see for the past 3 years we have been moving towards, taking steps in a direction that we felt that our Father was leading us in. In October of 2016, the Philippines returned to our world and we took the boys for 3 weeks to a 3rd world country and gave them a taste of life outside of Canada. In the fall of 2017, we moved our boys out of their private school into homeschooling so we could return to the Philippines for 2 months in January of 2018. This was the trip that launched the purpose of our return and the trip that brought on the vision for a longer trip. So in Fall of 2018, we sold almost everything we owned, moved in with my parents and returned to the Philippines for 7 months, and in that short time period, we established 2 commercial aquaponic farms. In essence, launched a fully operational and (almost) profiting company in 7 months.
These 3 trips were all filled with family vision and excitement. We were all onboard for each trip and every time we moved forward with the next trip the boys were, without a doubt, ready and willing. It was 3 years of transition, excitement, travel, downsizing, and family. We loved every moment and feel it was such a God-given time for us and for those who are now established in a new way of life with guaranteed income in the Philippines.
We approach the 4th trip and we find that things are shifting and changing. The 4th trip seems to be a tougher one to plan and to find the family vision for. So we pay attention…we wait and listen…and Mike and I both feel the pause button is being pressed. We are approaching a season where we need to be stable and available for our young men. A season of rest and refreshing for us as a family after 3 years of fast pace vision and action.
Can I just say this is a little hard for me? We have a family back in the Philippines. Our hearts are bound together and we built something…together. Dreams became reality and we did it together. We faced hard times and made it through stronger and our relationships deeper. To think that we are not going back this fall has caused my emotions to be a little unstable. I cry because I miss them and long to be there to help them. I am withdrawn because I am sad and I don’t know how to express what I am feeling as we make some changes for our family. The thought of living in a house, in Canada, with everything I could ever want at my fingertips sometimes makes my skin crawl. I don’t actually want this…but part of me knows without a doubt that this is the time to press pause. There is more peace in that direction then any other we moved towards in the last several weeks.
We can see that God is saying to us that our family comes first and our son’s faiths, friendships, and futures are top of the list. Our sons need us and they need this time. They need to feel valued, and heard. They need us to be available, and present. They need good friends and mentors. They will be making some big decisions in the coming 2-3 years and we want to set them up for success. Not worldly success with jobs and education but for life success, doing what they were created to do and loving it – whatever that looks like for them!
So I stop searching for flights back. I stop shopping for summer clothes that are all 50% OFF because I won’t be needing them anymore. I stop buying things that I might want to take back with me for next time. I stop…press pause on it all!
I take out my journal and I look for God’s promises from weeks and months ago to settle my soul and remind me that there is a plan – a good one in place.
Matthew 6:32-34 People who don’t know God and the way he works fuss over these things, BUT you know God and how He works. Steep your life in God-reality, God-initiative, God-provisions. don’t worry about missing out. You’ll find all your human everyday needs will be met.
2 Corinthians 9:8-11 God can pour on the blessings in astonishing ways so that you’re ready for anything and everything, more than just ready to do what needs to be done. As one Psalmist says, “He throws caution to the winds, giving to the needy in reckless abandon. His right-living, right-giving ways never run out. Never wear out.
Psalms 37:3-6/10-11 Get insurance with God and do a good deed, settle down and stick to your last. Keep company with God, get in on the best. Open up before God, keep nothing back; he’ll do whatever needs to be done: He’ll validate your life in the clear light of day and stamp you with approval at high noon. Before you know it, the wicked will have had it; you’ll stare at this once famous place and—nothing! Down-to-earth people will move in and take over, relishing a huge bonanza.
Our actions are being interrupted and we have been brought to a temporary stop.
We have been in action for the last 3 years…the pause button is being pressed.
It may not look how I planned or prepared but it is definitely a welcome detour from where we thought we were going.
If you feel you are being detoured, your plans are not working out or you are discouraged about your mission and vision in life be ENCOURAGED! Father God, has our best interests at heart. I know my God and his promises to me and how his truth goes before me. I am with peace and ready for what is to come and maybe even getting a little excited…